Many males complain that they don't understand females. Many females complain that they don't understand males. We also have the classic saying that men are from mars and women are from venus. Physically both sexes are very similar and are of the same species so what is the problem?After much reading on the subject, there seems to be a general consensus that there is a fundamental difference in the way men and women think. The bottom line is that men... Read More
All females need sexual tension from a prospective or existing partner to consider having or continuing to have, a physical relationship with them. Lose this from the start and you will become mayor of the friend zone.Definition of sexual tension - Cocky and funny. A loud mouth, walking the thin line of winding her up without overly offending her. Posing as a challenge and not doing everything she says without a bit of give and take.No sexual tension = a... Read More
Songs have been saying it for generations together. Ask anyone what the world needs and the one answer you would get is-" love". We need love at all times. It is the basis of all our relationships in one form or the other. Despite knowing and understanding the need for it, we haven't been able to understand it well enough. It has evoluted and here is its story.Everybody's saying that love can change the world but no one really knows... Read More
Do you want to find the "love of your life?"It's not easy to find Mr. or Miss "Right". And how do you know if you're right when you think you have?The chilling fact is 75% of marriages end up unhappy, separated or divorced. The stakes are high, yet the tools to help you make the right decision have been almost non-existent... until now!Scientific research has shown that picking the right person is the best way to achieve a great relationship.But... Read More
SOMETIMES I'LL ask a couple I'm seeing in therapy to do the following exercise.1. The husband and wife stand about six feet apart.2. The husband walks slowly toward his wife until he reaches a point where he no longer feels comfortable. Some men stop about three feet from their wives. Others stop at 30 inches and still others at 27.3. The wife now moves toward her husband or steps back from him, depending on how much space she feels she... Read More
Certain things about signs of infidelity come as a surprise to most people. Even people who pride themselves on being knowledgeable about extramarital affairs may be unfamiliar with the little-known facts below. This information is taken from Is He Cheating on You? ? 829 Telltale Signs.1. Telltale signs first begin to appear while the infidelity is still in the planning stage.2. Most cheaters display signs of infidelity they aren't even aware of, and wouldn't even think to cover up.3. Most... Read More
CHESS-MATEIf you're one of those guys telling to yourself that Antonio Banderas might be a little prettier then you but again your IQ beats that of Einstein by an inch, than the next lines were written for you. You have to know how to use your advantage against a two-digit IQ macho-man and this is no easy deal. Some studies even say that intelligence alone is actually not too sexy to most people. Therefore it would be wiser to use... Read More
Q: I can't believe I'm asking this question, because I can't believe I'm even feeling this way. My wife just got an offer that would give her a better and higher paying job than I have. I can't believe I am jealous, and even worse, I'm tempted to encourage her not to take it. How do I stop myself from doing something really stupid?I'm glad you wrote, because not only would you be doing something really dumb, you'd be pulling... Read More
Matters of the heart are a true mystery to all involved. In order tomake a commitment to a relationship, it takes strength and trust inanother. When we trust our partner and we receive trust back, it is avery nice feeling. One should never betray or play games with thattrust. Those games usually get caught, and a broken trust will surelycreate a huge wall of communication breakdown. When you truly trustanother, you are opening your heart and mind to an outsider.... Read More
Mark Twain once said that he believed it was "God's great cosmic joke on humanity when He required men and women to live together in marriage."When it comes to couples trying to communicate with each other, I believe old Mr. Clements was right on target.Every day in my office, I watch men and women trying to talk with each other. While from my chair I can understand what each person is trying to say, often times the couple will look... Read More
Remember the Tom Cruise movie "Jerry Maguire?"From my seat in the theater, this movie had a much more valuable message than it's catch phrase "show me the money."Tom Cruise plays the title character Jerry Maguire, a fast moving sports agent who lives for the big score and makes big money. After an attack of conscious, he is let go by his firm. Cuba Gooding, Jr. plays his one remaining client, football player Rod Tillman, a player with talent and an... Read More
Many of us stumble into marriage and then continue to make it up as we go along. But relationships need much more conscious planning in order to be successful. In a hectic and throwaway culture, couples need a vision for their relationship.What is a relationship vision?Just what is a relationship vision? It's a deliberate design for your relationship: what you're willing to give and what you would like to receive.Designing a relationship vision involves asking questions such as ``If we... Read More
Many of us stumble into marriage and then continue to make it up as we go along. But relationships need much more conscious planning in order to be successful. In a hectic and throwaway culture, couples need a vision for their relationship.What is a relationship vision?Just what is a relationship vision? It's a deliberate design for your relationship: what you're willing to give and what you would like to receive.Designing a relationship vision involves asking questions such as ``If we... Read More
I'm sorry can be words that are much too easy to say. The notion of apology and forgiveness in relationships takes "I'm sorry" into new territory that can be very healing and actually have meaning.The ability to apologize and to forgive is crucial to any long-term relationship. Many of us find it difficult to apologize.In order for an apology to be genuine, at least three elements need to be present:1) genuine remorse2) a commitment to 'turning away' from similar behavior... Read More
Conflict in a relationship is both normal and painful. In working with couples I have found that it's the successful resolution of the conflict that strengthens the couple's bond and brings them closer together. The resolution comes only by walking through the conflict and not around it.There is so much that can cause conflict, everything from the big five:1. money2. sex3. children4. in-laws5. religionall the way to the proper way to wash and dry dishes.While conflict can be incredibly painful,... Read More
Harville Hendrix, in his book ``Getting the Love You Want'' has some interesting and helpful notions about the process of falling in love. According to Hendrix, as we fall in love with someone, we believe that this person will be able to meet all of our emotional needs.But eventually the infatuation wears off and the day-to-day grind sets in. Partners begin to think or even say things such as ``You are not the person I married,'' or ``You're just like... Read More
In my workshops with couples, I start with this question:"How many of you believe men and women are created differently?"Usually most everyone agrees, and I congratulate them on passing Anatomy 101. The next question is slightly different:"How many of you believe that men and women think, feel, perceive and experience the world in sometimes dramatically different ways?"Usually most of the women agree and the men just look confused.The point is that these differences cause men and women to communicate in... Read More
Mark Twain once saidGod's great cosmic joke on the human race was requiring that men and women live together in marriage."Considering the difficulty of living with another person day after day and the incredibly high divorce rate in this country, the humor of the quote begins to fade.One of the most difficult tasks to take on in life is to commit to living with another person. For many people, it's one of the best things they ever did and one... Read More
Whether you've been in a relationship for a long time, or whether you're single, learning how to romance and love can be one of the greatest skills to learn (and believe me being romantic takes a lot of skill, for both men and women!). But what exactly is romance? I mean if you don't know what romance is, then how can you ever be romantic?Being romantic is more than just a bunch of red roses and a box of chocolates,... Read More
It is a commonly held belief, mainly amongst men, that romantic gestures are only given on Valentines Day. This shouldn't be the case however, and a romantic gift or gesture given at any time of the year can make your loved one feel really special.Is it really the thought that counts?As far as romantic gifts are concerned it really is the thought that counts. Often the most effective romantic gifts cost very little money but require effort to think of... Read More
